I had started drifting away from my healthy habits during the holidays last year, but thought I had a handle on it. But I didn't...and let myself drift back further and further into my bad habits and sugar addiction. It is a nasty, evil addiction. Every week I would vow to start again and get back on track. Although I made some progress, I'd slide back the next week and turn to food again. With months of poor eating combined with the lack of consistent exercise means I'm sitting here today at around 180 pounds. WHAT!!?? I NEVER EVER thought I would go back to this. EVER. After 4 years of successful maintenance I thought I would never go back. I am so disappointed in myself, frustrated, and I feel like a failure.
However, I know I can get back to fit and healthy and strong. I can make the necessary changes and I know I CAN DO IT. I've done it before and it was worth all the hard work. My weight is again affecting every single aspect of my life and I'm ready to tackle it. So this is where I'm starting--by being brave and honest and making myself vulnerable here on my blog. I'm ready to get back to the real me--the fit, strong, athletic, happy and confident me. I know blogging has helped me get perspective before, and feel connected to all of us who have food and weight issues. Blogging is part of my therapy. I'm committed to making this holiday season the one I give myself and my family the gift of taking care of myself again and getting back to healthy. Do you want to join me?
Of course it's not all about the weight, some good things have happened these past 8 months too. I did take 7 credits towards my degree, had fun in the garden, I competed in a trail obstacle course with my horse Koda, I started volunteering at a therapeutic riding center for special needs kids, I worked through my marriage issues and started couples therapy, I got off the night shift and started working days (since July), and we are almost done with our horse trailer remodel! Here's the pics:
My horse stepped on my foot the day before our first competition :(
Harley's broken leg, poor girl!
More dates for us, my husband's choice was shooting at the range
Our garden did pretty good, especially the nectarines and grapes!
This is a before and during of the horse trailer remodel, we are almost done!!
At the Labor Day Luau
We built a obstacle course for the horses at the barn
Our first competition!
On the trail at our first competition, so fun and beautiful surroundings!
Halloween, I had to do a horse carving!
We were all clowns this year, Koda wasn't thrilled with the idea!
Me and the hubs were rodeo clowns :)
Took a drive up American Fork Canyon, so pretty and the dogs had fun too!